Metro Minute: Winds of Change

Change. Yes, change. That thing everyone is scared of and yet demands. That thing that is never noticed when it's happening but seems dramatic and obvious in retrospect. That thing homeless people ask for. Okay maybe not that last one. I'm talking about change as in lifestyle. Heck , just life.

Coming to university I was nervous. I was scared. A little. For starters I was going to be living in a city that is about eighty times the size of my home country. Chew on that for a moment. Then, of course, I was moving from being homeschooled to attending a high end university. Also, I'm leaving my family behind and now living with my grandmother and cousin. Hardly the full house I'm used to. In addition, everyone was telling me to savor my last few weeks at home because when I came back for the holidays it would never be the same as before. This all had me worried. My life was about to change. A lot.

But then it didn't. Or at least, I didn't think it did. My family stayed in Montreal for about a week into my semester. Initially I found that annoying and irritating but in retrospect it was a very helpful way to transfer over into university. As the student services happened to be striking for most of the semester there were a few unexpected kinks and wrinkles that needed sorting out and it was helpful to have my parents a phone call away or closer at all times during the first week. They then left and I figured that the expected “culture shock” that I had been anticipating with excitement and dread for a while was about to happen.

For starters, it's kinda weird to “expect” a shock of sorts. I mean, the whole thing with a shock is that it's unexpected, right? Well, for me it just didn't happen. Montreal is my birthplace and home away from home already. It's a familiar place. Granted I was seeing a whole other side of it being in university and all but it was still familiar. Homely. Comfortable. A few weeks passed and I was finding my rhythm with school, church, and becoming more and more familiar with everything. Suddenly I realized that I hadn't had any transition really. I never felt like I was in a strange environment. I had to remind myself at times, “Nathaniel...you're in university now. The next step in life! You're gone from home! This is big! You should be kinda shocked right now.” But no. I kept gliding through as if nothing had changed.

Another thing was my connection back home. Thanks to the magic that is technology I have been still able to maintain a near constant link back home. At times this is annoying and I'd like to be left alone but at least it's easier to ignore a blinking phone than it is an actually person speaking in front of me. However, it's still helpful to maintain a lot of the comfort of “home”. This all said I was warned that “home” would never be the same. It would never look the same again. It would still be nice to return there but it would, from then on, be merely a temporary stay. I no longer “live” there. I'm welcome to long visits but am no longer a proper resident. But, as somewhat worrisome as this may be I've again not really noticed any real, tangible change.

Finally, there are my siblings. Due to the constant connection I had with them in living under the same roof as them I knew I'd be happy to get away and believe me I certainly was. Again, ignoring skype is much, much easier than a persistent little sister (even though she's still persistent on skype...”away” means “away”. It does not mean “call me I'm dying to hear from you”). However, with the older two, Jordan and Abigail, the relationship between us has changed. Again, not in any really noticeable form over time but looking back holy cow is it ever different. Not having to interact with each other every single day means our communications are purely voluntary and we both want to be in conversation together. If you want to do something, you're automatically going to enjoy it more. It's an amazing thing. I've always wondered how it will work as we all grow up and spread out across the planet. My aunts and uncles on my father's side all, with the exception of one, reside in Bermuda, meaning they're all very close. Will it be the same with me and my own siblings? I now have seen a small glimpse into what it will be like.

Life is completely different now. I didn't want things to be different. I liked my life at home. I was able to subsist on a wonderful diet of math, music, computers, and photography. I loved it. It was comfortable. Familiar. Life was good. But now it has all changed. Again, I didn't want it to change, but oh my. Is it ever wonderful here on the other side. The weirdest thing is though; I knew it would change, I expected it to change, I have seen that it has changed, but, I never saw it change. I did not notice a thing. My piano teacher drew a good analogy; it's like getting taller. Suddenly you realize you can see the top of a table. That's a big milestone. But you probably didn't notice the progress being made to that point. So now here I am, seeing the top of the table for the first time. I'm noticing the drastic difference from before when I couldn't see it. But I didn't notice a thing meanwhile. And that, I think, is a great way to change.